Here Alone

Today was the last day of my play.

It's an odd feeling to end the play. I've spent every night for the last two weeks doing nothing but Little Women. Now, I have to go back to having no life after school.

I'll miss a kid named Ryan, who came back to our school just to help with the play after graduating two years back. I'm going to miss him because he's not going to be around the school. I'll probably never even see him again. It seems like the play went too fast. During Oliver! (the play I did in 7th grade, when Ryan was a senior and still went to our school) I never really talked to Ryan. I was a much younger kid and I was very intimidated by all of the seniors. This year, I talked to him quite a bit. When we got in our circle before each show, I held his hand. We joked together. I mean, it's not like we had some extraordinary connection. I'll just miss the hell out of him. He's very hilarious and very talented. And, I'll be honest, attractive and irresponsible.

I love to perform. I wish I could do it every weekend. I feel a strange, empty sensation now that it's gone. I have to wait until next year to do another play. I love that stage. I don't even want to think about my senior year.

I wish I could spend every week with this cast. It's making me so sad that some of them are leaving. I wish we could all stay together, as we are. Strong, like a fortress.